Category Archives: Marketing

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Marketing 101 | Reach Your Customers through Their PAIN

*Originally posted on March 15, 2011 by PhilStalnaker at Pro/Vision Coaching.

Recently, I was delayed (when I say “delayed” it was more like an effort on the airline’s part to force me to move to Chicago permanently) and hunkered down at an outlet near a credit card kiosk. As I charged my phone, I couldn’t help but watch the two sales people try relentlessly to capture the attention of the hurried passers-by. The incentive they offered was actually a good deal—a free flight after the first swipe—but no one was interested. Why not? If we were to put their success rate into numbers, it would have to be less and a half percent success rate.

Let’s break it down: at Midway airport, there are 6 gates at the end of the concourse set in a semi-circle. The kiosk was perfectly located at the entrance to the semi-circle, where at least 10 flights per hour were shuffled through (coming AND going). At the average of 135 passengers per flight (according to the airline), over the course of 8 hours, that puts the foot traffic at around 21,600 people during their 8 hour stretch. FYI, I started watching during the last 30 minutes of these particular salespeople’s shift. I inquired how many credit card apps they had sold, which they embarrassedly answered “2”. That means, they literally succeeded at a rate of .000093%.

What was so wrong? Who would not be willing to take a free flight that literally took nothing from them? I say that, because I had already taken advantage of that deal and had acquired the free flight myself. Despite how friendly the salespeople were, no one cared. Curious to find out why, I interrupted a conversation between one of the salespeople and a lady who was overly against this deal. As an objective third party, I asked her why she was so against the deal. Her answer was blunt and honest, “I hate this credit card company”, she said. “They worked me over before and I won’t forgive them.”

“Makes sense to me,” I said, but quickly responded with another question. “Why not sign up, use your swipe to buy a gallon of milk, get your free flight, and then discontinue the card? You would be out nothing, but would have successfully enacted revenge on the company you are angry towards, and you are taking the flight from them.” Without hesitation she turned, filled out the application with a smile, then walked over to me after and thanked me for my help.

5 minutes later that exact same situation repeated itself with a married couple. Again I interrupted the conversation (I also had to include some advice on where to find the pizza that everyone else had while walking around), and again the result was exactly the same. These salespeople, in the last 5 minutes of their shift signed 2 credit card applications from people who were audibly NOT fans of their company. All they had to do was speak to their pain. I’ve already typed over 500 words at this point, so hopefully the lesson is evident, as I doubt I can make the next 500 interesting enough for you to read. Of course, this could never have happened if my flight wasn’t delayed for over 5 hours…

By the way, the credit card companies have no problem with giving people easy ways to opt out after getting the incentive, because statistics show that less than 5% of people will actually go to the effort of discontinuing the card. Laziness, and the credit card companies, win out in the end.

I’m also posting a picture of the shirt that the sales people gave me as a thank-you for getting them those sales.

So What? I Enjoy Hitting Myself on the Head with a Hammer! | Why Do It Yourself Websites Don’t Work

Originally posted at JM Web Designs.

As much as I would enjoy writing another column focused on undergarments, there is only so much material I can cover. Underwear, as one might say, is only part of the outfit. The question is, do you dress yourself, or does someone else pick out your clothes for you?

Actually, that is not the question at all. Today’s question is directed at those “so-called” home improvement experts that believe you can hang your own drywall, even though the only help you have is your wife who is just over five feet tall trying to hold the drywall against the ceiling while standing on a swivel chair. Don’t worry, mine had only six weeks of rehabilitation after the accident.

What exactly is the point? There is a reason people go to school and train to be good builders – THEY ENJOY THE WORK. I don’t and yet I do it anyway. If we are honest, how many of us figure that if we do certain tasks ourselves, we can save money by not hiring a professional? Allow me to tell you a story.

I thought it would be a great idea to renovate my basement. 1970s paneling was still a few years away from coming back into style and I wanted to make sure I was trendy, so I decided one day to pull off the paneling and re-finish my basement. That was ten weeks ago and I have not had a good Saturday since. Smashed thumbs, dust filling up my lungs, the gentle aroma of the landfill – all things I could have lived without ever experiencing are now my normal weekend routine. Why? Because I was greedy and wanted to save cash. Thankfully, the only people that are forced to look at my basement are my wife, myself, and the friends that I tricked into helping me paint.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OZxh8rZ3rWA&feature=player_embedded

This analogy holds true when building a website. In fact, there are a lot of similarities between home and website construction. For example, do you want one person building an entire home? [No one is allowed to answer, “Yes! Bob Vila!”] There are lots of different specialties that go into building a house – architectural designing, framing, plumbing, electrical engineering, etc… A properly built website requires designers (graphic artists), coders, developers, researchers, marketers, and programmers (guys who sit in the dark and chug Code Red Mountain Dew all day long).

Now, there are people who are better at working with their hands and for most projects a little “imperfection” is acceptable, but not always. When publicly presenting your company do you want to put your best foot forward or allow your potential customers to see the cracks in your drywall? A poorly constructed website can actually cause more damage to your company image than not having one at all. Are the few dollars you might save by constructing a website yourself worth the headaches, frustrations, and eventual throwing of the keyboard?

As my television mentor (Homer Simpson) once said, “If at first you don’t succeed, stop trying.”

What’s the Difference Between Underwear and a Website?

Update: This article was originally written in 2010, but most still applies (including the unfortunate truth that Courtney Love is still making headlines and “The View” is still on the air). Since I have recently relocated and started work at another high-level web design firm, I thought it appropriate to reshare an old memory. The original link to this article post is here. I hope you all can enjoy this (and maybe even learn a deeper lesson) with me. Thanks!

With such an obviously sensationalistic title as that, I better quickly give you a reason not to hate me and send threatening letters to my boss. Though it may not seem like it, there is definitely a method to my madness. In my ever creative mind – which is a place that would make Stephen King an author for children’s books – I wanted to parley the importance of a website to your company’s credibility while at the same time not boring you to the point of squirting the toothpaste sitting in your medicine cabinet all over your face in an attempt to go blind. That’s where I came up with the question of the week, which is “What’s the difference between underwear and a website?” My answer – none at all. Allow me to explain why before reporting me to the FCC. There are four reasons that make a very easy comparison to what underwear does for you as opposed to a website.

1. Ratty or torn underwear can undermine your best outfit. Ok, so this actually happened to me within the last few weeks. I went to visit the doctor and needed an x-ray, which meant that I had to go into a private room, strip down to only my boxers, and put on a gown. The problem was that I had been wearing an old pair of torn up boxers and was embarrassed for someone to see me. When the technician came to get me, I had that gown tied as tightly as I could to make sure no one saw anything. Fear is never a fun way to live. The comparison to this is simple: if you look bad on your website, do you really think anyone is going to want to do business with you?

2. The right underwear provides foundation support that hides your flaws. If you have ever watched “The View” then we might need to have a different conversation, but they talk about ways for women to make themselves look as good as possible. This means, for most humans anyway, that we have to hide our flaws. If you have a big belly, what better way to hide it than a girdle? Although “Lethal Weapon 3” is the only example of a man wearing a girdle that I can think of, the theory holds true for both genders. One of the wonderful things a website can do for your company is make you appear bigger, stronger, and more capable by presenting yourself as well as possible. This of course can go too far – but those instances will be brought to light if your website shows you in a suit and tie and you are still in your robe when customers walk into your place of business.

3. The right underwear can provide the spark needed to capture your target’s interest. Alright guys, let’s be honest here – a girl who knows how to dress properly and “wear her clothes right” is usually going to win the battle of the sexes. The flash of a bra strap or stockings coyly shown goes a long way in winning a man’s attention. The creativity in the design of your website can accomplish the same thing – get people interested in you. Once they are interested, all you have to do is close the deal. Just make sure not to look your best and then forget to use mouthwash once they start talking to you.

4. The style of your underwear determines the style of your clothes. According to the fashion stylists of the world (motto: pain = style), a person’s choice of undergarments has a great deal to do with the outfit on top. Infomercial after infomercial discusses ways to “hide panty lines”, and no one except for Courtney Love would wear a normal bra with a backless dress. Thus, if you want to present yourself in a certain way, then you need to plan accordingly the underwear of the day. I saw an advertisement for a company that sells social media marketing options on the internet last month – and they didn’t have a website! It makes sense that if you want your customers to find you, you should probably have the right system set up for that to happen – don’t be caught reaching an audience that likes the internet with a phone book ad. I would definitely consider that a “web faux pas”. So, what’s the point? At least that was what my friends asked me when previewing this article. My answer – delayed slightly by a few glugs of Red Bull – was simple. Medicine tastes better when mixed with a spoonful of sugar. If a business wants to splash their information on the internet, all the power to them – but if they want to sell, then they better make it hot.

by Phil Stalnaker